Lessons in Faithese

I haven’t posted for awhile and my brain is shot, so let’s do something fun today, shall we? I thought so.

In my childhood, I lived in many different locations. I was born in Virginia, then moved to Massachusetts. My earliest memory is from Pennsylvania, where we lived for five or six years before moving to Louisiana. Then we went to South Carolina, and finally returned to the mountainous state of PA. For good. Or so we think anyway.

Because of this, my dialect is…quirky. Not to mention that my family has a tendency to make up its own words for things. So today’s blog post is all about teaching you to talk like me, because who wouldn’t want to know that? Let’s start with the fun stuff.


  1. Meep!

I think I got this from an episode of Phineas and Ferb, where an alien named Meep landed in their backyard. All this alien ever says is Meep. I picked it up because I like languages, obviously. It’s also a really easy non-offensive sound to make whenever anything unexpected and slightly devastating happens, from stubbing my toe to dropping my pencil or homework behind the bed. It also displays distress much better than a traditional swear, I think.

  1. Mark!

See Meep. I have no idea where I got this one. I don’t even know a Mark.

  1. Ow!

Contrary to what you might think, I do not say this when I get hurt. Okay, sometimes I do, but mostly it’s an expression of surprise.

  1. Hello!

I got this one from British books. Uttered upon encountering something (or someone) unexpected.

  1. AKF EAFEH IEAGELA (or gutteral screams that sound like Dark Speech)

THIS one is for when I get hurt. Or am just very upset. Sometimes I will howl. Most of the time I sound like I’m trying to call demons down upon the earth. (I’m not, I promise.)


  1. Chippie

A chip. Or, if you’re from Britain, a crisp. This one comes from my younger siblings.

  1. Loopie.

A hair tie. I was legitimately surprised when I learned no one else says this.

  1. Delicious

Ham. This also hearkens from the children of my family

  1. Snail.

The hand motion in which the middle and ring finger touch the top of the thumb, while the fore and little finger are raised. Many people call this a llama. I have met one individual who calls this a slug.


  1. Any noun with -ing at the end. Or any noun, period.

See fooding, storying, and verbing. Oftentimes a legitimate verb exists for this, but shh.


  1. Monstrously

I picked this up from Paperfury. I’m sure she would be monstrously pleased.

  1. Delicious/deliciously

Basically synonymous with “extreme/ly.” Deliciously frustrating, deliciously good, deliciously bad, deliciously hard… Don’t ask me when I starting wanting to eat everything. I have no idea. I don’t usually say this one out loud for obvious reasons.

So there you go! Tidbits from the Faithian dialect. Hopefully y’all enjoyed this…and of course, don’t forget to stay crazy.